News Dec 4th 2015

6 Worst People At Every Party

Fun Time

College life in the UK is quite different from the US, even their parties. While college students in the US have fraternity parties on Friday and Saturday night, those in the UK have no frats at all. Instead, UK students party during the week so they can go home on the weekends. Because they have no frats, there are no frat houses, so parties are usually at bars or clubs nearby. Failing that, a house party (students have to find their own housing off campus after their first year) will do just nicely.

However, US and UK college students do have two things in common. One, is they firmly believe that partying is a seriously important part of college life. The second universal belief is that there are people who consistently and unerringly make parties less fun that it should be, just by being their own annoying selves. There is no research on this, because it's are self-evident. Here are the 6 worst people at every party, UK style.

The Rat-Arsed

In the UK, it is legal to drink if you are 18, so that means mostly anyone in university. There is no need for fake IDs or sneaking around! However, there is always one person in a party who gets pissed as fast as possible and then goes on to stagger around, bumping into tables, getting shrill or slurry, and generally making a bloody mess before passing out.

The Snapchat Fiend

There is nothing wrong with wanting to get a few shots of the party to prove you actually have friends, but to do it all night in lieu of actually socializing with people is not only annoying, it's rude. If people wanted a second by second account of what was happening, they would have gone to the party!

The Ponce

This bloke always manages to make everybody around them feel like they ought to go home and change or brush up on their Debrett's. It isn't so much on what he says; it is more of the way he looks, and looks at everybody. Always refined, slightly snooty, he is not the kind of person you want around when you plan to get pissed, or have a little rumpy-bumpy, or both.

The Shirty

Coming to a party in a bad mood is bad enough, but letting everybody know it is the worst buzz kill. They go stomping around with an all-mighty frown, growling at everybody, and scowling at anybody who is actually having a good time, God forbid. Who invited the bloke, anyway?

The Gobby

Someone who just doesn't want to shut up is the bane of all party goers. It is okay to want to have your say, but the rant just goes on and on, just like that song from the Titanic. No one can get a word in edgewise (to at least break up the monotony) and no one can change the subject. The worst part is being trapped in a corner with a gobby with no hope of escape except to pretend to pass out drunk. Just hope you had enough beer to make it believable.

The Prig

If you need a definition of a person who should not go to a college party, ever, it is the prig. They don't know how to have fun, and anyone who does is not doing it properly. They are outraged at lewd jokes, and think harmless pranks are stupid. When you think about it these antics are indeed mostly dumb, but nobody wants it pointed out.

A college party is a great place to have fun, let off some steam, and maybe make a friend or two. No one wants any of these people ruining it for everybody, but they come anyway.



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